Since yesterday, my head feels like two women are alternatively pounding fufu on it, I had drank panadol it still refuse to stop.
So my friend called On Monday to inform me that the state is giving out grants for willing entrepreneurs.
Na so I rejoiced, who doesn’t like awoof thing?
The next day, I went with Ada to the community bank to fill out forms, on reaching, people where few.
Turning to Ada, I said ”e be like say this thing go favour us oo ! ”
” God I thank you, I dey throw away cap for you’ I said to myself
With the ac on full blast, we sat down to fill the form,Ada was sitting opposite me.
I filled that I wanted to start poultry business, because I’m experienced, my parents were poultry farmers. I also filled that I want #350,000 to start it. I figured that I won’t pay back it, and I’m not that greedy.
I look up to see if Ada has finished, and she had. I signalled for her to stand up let’s submit it together.
This place dey too tush for me abeg
She refused to interpret, she was afraid.
As a good friend, considering that she was the one that brought this opportunity.
I stood up and angrily snatched her own form… then matched to the office.
Wetin the man fit do me sef
I forgot about the whole grant stuff till yesterday they called me to come and collect the approved laminated form. I didn’t study the form I was given till I reached home.
”Blood of Zaccaria! What the…” I shouted staring dumbfounded at the form.
The money approved for me was #15million instead of #350,000 and I was to receive the alert by Monday next week
”This people na wayoo! This thing no fit be free money, this one they choose #15million for me!”
“Let me look for dictionary, wetin be grant sef! They want me to pay them back this money”
I started looking for the meaning of grant, the ones I saw didn’t satisfy me…I kept looking till I saw ‘loan’ at the end of the line.
”Hey eeeh! I said it, this thing can’t be free’ I said in hysterics
I dailed Ada, she picked on first ring.
”Ada! this people gave me #15 million instead of the amount I wrote”
“If I sell all my clothes e no reach #100k sef” I yelled, not even giving her the chance to talk
After getting the whole gist Ada, started laughing at me till I threatened to cut the call.
”This girl! this na free joor, one woman I know, dey pay am”
“they even gave her 3.5 million” she said between laughter
But… Something fishy is going on, how can they give someone that amount of money in this Nigeria?
So, since yesterday I have been thinking… For Money wey I never see.